What I Say I'm A Software Develop Shirt, Hoodie, Tank
What I Say: I’m a software developer.
What People Hear: I can repair your computer, fix your internet, configure your printer, revive your phone, set up your email, build a billion-dollar app, and hack into any system. All for free. I am the IT god.
What I Mean: I tell the computer to do things and I usually Google when it doesn't work.